Deleted. On Tuesday I was handling a plate in the kitchen and it slipped from my hands, it broke and I slammed my wrist into the counter trying to save it. A piece of the porcelain was lodged in my wrist but I had thought that I had most of it washed out. Delirious from the pain, I took Tylenol and Advil, made it downstairs and passed out. I put an away message up “Je suis en deleur; je manqué t’elle” from the French, I am in pain, I miss her. I found that when I was sick for such a long time this semester, when I have been battling my depression, I don’t miss anyone in particular, and when it was someone that I deeply missed it was always Ck, but I missed having someone there that supported me, someone that I could cry in front of, someone that I could be broken in front of. I can say that I can walk away from this experience being able to cry in front of a mirror and see a smile in my eyes, my brokenness is what makes me whole, my flaws are what make me unique, and I can lean on myself because indeed I am a strong person.
So yesterday after having slept with a piece of porcelain still in my arm I went in to get my wrist x-rayed, luckily it was all soft tissue damage and aside from the piece of the plate that my dad dug out there was no serious damage luckily. I would hate to have to audition with a cast on my wrist. Actually, come to think of it, I have broken my nose several times, but never had to have a cast, the thought of having something in a cast just bothers me. I see myself as someone who goes AMA after being told they need a cast.
So I just have a gnarly gash on my wrist that looks like a botched suicide attempt, as long as I keep it wrapped and the Vitamin E on it, I shouldn’t even get a scar. It’s not even that impressive of a story, maybe if it involved a bar fight where I was defending a maiden’s honor with my broken bottle, and I had to take a slash to get the inside jab …. Nah. Unfortunately it’s just from trying to catch a broken plate. But it hurt like a mother, and hurt even worse when I woke up in the morning and my body was rather pissed that there was still a piece of it inside me, let me tell you, the body is amazingly in tune, if there is a foreign body in there it’s going to put you through all sorts of pain and torture to get it out of there.
Chapters have closed in my life, some I have closed, some have closed on me, right now, and it’s one step in front of the other. I have been listening to a lot of Colin Hay lately, and taking my iPod to the bar when I am on service duty. This song is on repeat and will be for the next couple of weeks I am sure.
Colin Hay Band, “Waiting For My Real Life to Begin”
Any minute now, my ship is coming in
I'll keep checking the horizon
I'll stand on the bow, feel the waves come crashing
Come crashing down, down, down, on me
And you say, be still my love
Open up your heart
Let the light shine in
But don't you understand
I already have a plan
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened
But in my dreams, I slew the dragon
And down this beaten path, and up this cobbled lane
I'm walking in my old footsteps, once again
And you say, just be here now
Forget about the past, your mask is wearing thin
Let me throw one more dice
I know that I can win
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
Any minute now, my ship is coming in
I’ll keep checking the horizon
And I'll check my machine, there's sure to be that call
It's gonna happen soon, soon, soon
It's just that times are lean
And you say, be still my love
Open up your heart, let the light shine in
Don't you understand
I already have a plan
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
Also I have a fantastic cocktail that is free to a good home. This has become the most popular drink that I have created for 303, I love it, the regulars love it, and I am told that it is never coming off of the Aperitif List. It feels good to make your mark. It has a name, so ask in the comments but I think if you taste it, it inspires you to name it after the person that inspired you to make it. Any restaurant that I ever work in I will fight tooth and nail to get this on the menu with its proper name, it’s that good.
1.5 oz Raspberry Vox Vodka
0.5 oz Disarronno Amaretto
0.75 oz Chambord
Half of a squeezed lime
1 oz fresh passion fruit puree
Lay the passion fruit puree in the base of a chilled cocktail glass
Shake the first four ingredients in a Boston shaker with plenty of ice and strain, layering on top of the passion fruit puree, pouring over the back of a spoon as to keep the pousse-café structure of the drink. Garnish with a raspberry wrapped with an orange twist.
Labels: Relationships
This will be one of the last sketches that I can post here, I made it taking little dabbles with a different types of charcoal. It's a way to say goodbye; I have said it before and thouroughly believe it that I want you to be happy, I can't be a part of that happiness and in a sense it's a relief not to have that responsibility on my shoulders anymore. And for all you facebook readers click on "see original link" so you can see the scan. I was going to put this up earlier this week, but I can't post the original text that went with the sketch unfortunately. Maybe someday when it's all processed. Je manque vous.
